How to begin a relationship with the Holy Trinity

Homily for the Solemnity of the Most Holy Trinity

Do you have a personal relationship with Jesus?  It’s a good question. On the Solemnity of the Most Holy Trinity, a better question might be, “Do you have a relationship with the Holy Trinity?  Do you have a personal relationship with God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit?

I’ve been to many Masses on Trinity Sunday where the gist of the homily is this:  The Trinity is a mystery that we’ll never be able to understand.  The homilist might throw in terms like “coequal, coeternal, consubstantial… sharing the divine essence while maintaining their distinct identities.” 

In trying to figure this out in our head, it is easy to miss what is most important, that which stems from our heart.  Relationship.  “God is love,”  Saint John states in his first letter  (4:8)  For love to exist, there needs to be a lover and a beloved.  There needs to be a relationship.  The Trinity is in essence a relationship. The Father loves the Son.  The son returns the love to the Father.  The Holy Spirit is that dynamic exchange of love. 

This love relationship extends to us.  We are made in the image and likeness of God.  We are made to be join in this relationship between Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

What does this relationship look like?  Let’s compare it to human relationships.  Remember a time when you fell in love.  If you can’t remember, just imagine.  Something stirred in your heart.  You wanted to be with that person.  You wanted to know what the other liked, what he or she thought about you.  You would sit on the couch, being with each other.  One would say a few words, then silence, then the other would say a few words. 

The relationship began with the stirrings in your heart, your desires, your longing, your hopes, and your dreams.  At some point in this relationship, a little curiosity would stir in your head.  Where does this person live and what does he/she do for a living?  Where did he come from? 

Similarly, the relationship with the Trinity begins in the heart. People don’t fall in love with a theological construct. They fall in love with a person, or in this case, the three persons Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

How can we nurture this relationship?  One word, conversation. 

Saint Ignatius in his Spiritual Exercises uses a fancy word for conversation.  He calls it a colloquy.  Before you enter into many of these exercises, he says to start with a conversation with the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, “speaking as one friend speaks to another”  (SE 54). In a conversation, one person talks, then the other listens.  Then the other person talks, and the first person listens. 

Here are a couple of ways I offer a colloquy to the Trinity. 

One way is gazing at Rublev’s icon of the Holy Trinity.  It depicts three figures sitting around a table, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.  The Son sits in the center of the icon.  He is gazing at the Father, who is sitting at his right.  The father is gazing across the table to the Holy Spirit, although the way the artist depicted the eyes, one could say they are also looking at the son.  To the left of the son is the Holy Spirit.  His gaze is slightly downcast, as if pondering, thinking, maybe even looking for inspiration. 

One of the beauties of the icon is that the facial expressions seem to shift, maybe depending upon the light or the angle I am looking at it.  Because of this, I receive different impressions each time I look at the icon, sometimes the eyes are downcast eyes saying, “That’s a bad idea.”  Sometimes they twinkle and say, “That will be delightful.” 

A year ago, when I left the Catholic Conference Center, I didn’t have a firm plan as to what’s next, and I was getting a little panicked.  I turned to Jesus in the icon.  “What’s next?”  Jesus turned to the Father.  The Father looked like he said, “I don’t know.”  Then turned to the Holy Spirit.  The Holy Spirit said, “Let’s surprise him.”  The Father said, “I love surprises.”  The Son just nodded. 

I sometimes have a different colloquy early in the morning.  I live on a little cove of Lake Norman, in a house that is mostly in the woods.  In my preferred chair, there are trees all around, and a round opening of sky in the middle, like a goldfish bowl. 

My chair faces one large tree in particular.  When I raise my eyes to this tree, I am lifting my eyes to God the Father, the creator of all of this beauty.  To the Father, I bring a little negative self-talk.  Being resentful, feeling overlooked or unappreciated, envious that others are chosen instead of me. (Pretty much most of the petitions in the Litany of Humility)  From the Father, I receive His love.  I hear the words, “You are my beloved with whom I am well pleased.”  As his beloved, the opinions of the world matter not, my true identity comes from being loved by my Father.

My chair is sitting next to another chair.  In this chair, I imagine Jesus is sitting next to me.  I can barely see him out of the corner of my eye.  I want to be united in his mission.  From him, I receive my marching orders, and he is leading me to do a lot of ministry to the marginalized.  I learn how to be his eyes, ears, and hands.  When the burden becomes too heavy or I become overwhelmed, I receive his grace to carry on.

The Holy Spirit appears a couple of different ways, and provides with surprising insights, inspirations, and creativity.  Sometimes it’s the wind, and the movement of the leaves in the trees.  Sometimes it’s the water, the occasional waves and ripples.  Sometimes it’s one of the large birds flying one.   These manifestations of nature remind me that the Spirit is there to give me the inspiration, and the insight, the truth.  The spirit reminds me that I am in community with all of God’s creation. 

In one particular dark time last Fall, I saw a shooting star.  That’s certainly a sign.  To make it even more punctuated, the star was going up.  Most of the time I don’t get those types of signs, but more the subtle nudgings and gentle insights. 

My experience praying in the natural surroundings around my house brings out an added dimension to our greeting during Mass:  The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Love of God, and the community of the Holy Spirit be with you.”  I feel that grace, love, and community during my morning conversation.

Saint Ignatius says the first colloquy is to be with the Blessed Mother.  Interesting. 

This colloquy is not filled with formal prayers like Hail Mary or Hail Holy Queen, which are admirable.  This colloquy is more like a kitchen table conversation.  Your sitting there talking to Mother Mary.  You say, “Mamma Mary, I’ve got this problem.”  She says, “Tell me about it, beautiful child.” Have a conversation with the three persons of the Trinity this week.  Father, Son, and Spirit.  And if you don’t know how, have a kitchen table conversation with Mother Mary and ask her to show you.